Ten Ways to Make Money Fast (Go Help Yourself Series)



Everybody needs money, but not everybody is as smart as you. More importantly, not everybody has this scientifically-normalized "How-To-Guide" for step-by-step money-making.

Mathematically, there are steps you can take to actually make more money. Leave your poor friends behind and say hello to your rich friends because you're (honestly) probably going to start making a lot of money really soon.

Includes step-by-step instructions for:

-Checking the Couch Cushions for loose change
-Mob Loans
-Breeding Spiders

Part of the "Go Help Yourself" series of self-help books. With this series you get:

  • -Savagely Helpful
  • -"Telling it like it is"
  • -Step-by-step instructions for a better life
  • -No Refunds


Styles & Genres: self-help, satire

Released: July, 2016


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About Me:

I write weird stories and novels. I like vivid wordplay and far-out adventures. I like to explore subtle ideas, juxtapositions, scary aspects of personal development, and just generally far-out stuff. I like Hard Art, stuff that's upsetting, but also stuff that's just fun and beautiful. That's what's fun for me, and I hope it will be fun for you too. Fun and scary.


Most of my books are independently published. I like the control. I like hiring cover artists and designing the book myself. I have worked with publishers, and I'll do so again, but I'm a very DIY kinda guy and I love the process of giving you something that's completely my own invention.


When I make electronic music I tend to use the rhythm and beat-structure of dance music, while the melodic structure is more influenced by rock, funk, and metal. I've used FruityLoops, Reason, and the powerful (and volatile) suite of music production software in Linux.


I was born in Newfoundland, Canada. I got my degree from St. Thomas University in Fredericton, New Brunswick. I've worked as a line cook, machine operator, web designer, and a bunch of other things.


I also do audio production Psymposia's weekly consciousness-expansion podcast. They're a great organization and you should check them out.


 About this site:

I've "re-vamped" my personal website way too many times. Usually I just want something noisy, jarring, and fun to look at. But I decided I needed something more functional so I built this content-management system in Flask, with Python. Now if I want to update it I'll just change the visuals, but the backend should be solid.


This is the main source for information about my work. Details about my books and music, my publishing history, where to buy my stuff, plus my blog and links to other cool site.


...but it's also a place to just put ridiculous things on the internet. I like internet noise. Glitch art. Broken things. So humour me by exploring it a little bit.


You can drop me a line at info [at] pattmayne [dot] com. I'll probably respond.

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